In His Shoes
by Jealous Maureen
Summary: Collins takes a stand in chruch, oneshot. T for attacking chruch.


**I've been working with this idea forever. But then I had 75 of it finished, and then Stephanie came up here and shut her computer down. So it went bye bye. So I had to start from scratch.**

**Maybe she was offended… **

**NOTES: I am not attacking the church at all. This is just a personal experience and I thought it would be good to apply this to RENT. **

**Oh and I'm not sure if there is a Fifth and 53rd, or if there is even a church there. I don't know…at all. **

**And I am a supreme Liberal. So if I offend you, I'm sorry. Suck it up and deal, I offend everyone. Or if you think I'm a republican, I will come to your house and hurt you. Don't ever think I'm one of them. –shivers- **

**Disclaimer: Why do we even do this? I don't own Rent. **

_Will I lose my dignity? _

_Will someone care?_

_Will I wake tomorrow?_

_From this nightmare?_

Collins tugged his shirt as he slowly walked up the marble steps. He looked around, the stairs into the small Methodist church on the corner of Fifth and 53rd were crowded. Children and parents, hand in hand, prancing up the steps. Angel was holding Collins' hand, confident of what she was doing. She didn't care that there was people looking at them, she was happy.

"Collins, thank you so much."

Angel had asked him to come with him to church for Easter. Collins was reluctant at first. But after a few hours of begging and pleading, Collins caved to a dinner and ice cream on her.

"Whatever you want, baby."

They walked into the church and looked around. There were a number of people mingling around the entrance hall. They were all in deep discussion. They were probably from the service before and talking about the priest's sermon.

They went into the Worship Center and looked around. The wooden pews were filled with people and they found on in the middle. Angel warmly greeted the two people sitting beside us, asking about themselves. Angel seemed so comfortable in the church. She was, of course, raised Catholic and wanted to come to church just one last time. She was comfortable, at ease.

Unlike Collins.

He was surrounded by people he didn't know. The people who knew each other so well and discussed him and the people like him. People judged him and his type before they even knew him.

The organ started and they all stood up. The people started singing songs when the chorus behind the stage started to croon. Angel pulled the hymnal out and started singing along with the song. The song was called Amazing Grace. Even though the words were right in front of him, Collins already knew all the words. He never went to church when he was a kid, then he came out, and his parents didn't even try to go anymore. The words were so familiar.

When Roger sang the lyrics.

When he found out that he had AIDS and April committed suicide, then words slowly surfaced in the apartment. Except, these people sang this song with love and compassion. They sang this song, wanting to know more and more about the one who would receive it. But when Roger sang the song, he didn't sing with passion. He sang with hatred. Brewing hatred towards God every time he sang it. Every time he sung the song again, it was more and fuller of anger. It had the hatred and the wrath bursting out of it as he sang the song. And it got to a point to where Collins came home, and Roger was screaming the words. He wasn't singing, he was yelling the words. After that, Roger didn't pick his guitar up for six months.

_Will I lose my dignity?_

_Will someone care?_

_Will I wake tomorrow?_

_From this nightmare?_

They sat down when the singing was over. The rest of the service went quickly. With people blessing stuff and proclaiming their love for God and Jesus. Then the preacher came out. He was smiling at everyone, he then approached the stand.

"My brother and sisters, we are gathered here today, to proclaim the word of Christ. To tell the world that God's Only Son died to save our souls. He purchased our souls, with his blood. He is why we are able to enter heaven and why we must obey his commandments. We need to obey the rule and commandments to please him. He died for our sins, why do not obey him? Why do we run away and break the rules he laid down for us?"

Collins was starting to predict where this guy was going with this. He looked over at Angel, who was soaking up every word of this sermon. He was nervous. His angel was going to take this person's idea and maybe actually consider it?

"Today, is about Jesus, and how he rose from the dead and how, so many people in this word go unapperciating it. I mean, he _died _for us. He descended into hell for a day, so that we could go to heaven. Would anyone here do that? Would you kill yourself for someone you didn't even know? Would you leave your family and friends behind, for some complete stranger? No, you wouldn't. No one would. But Jesus did. Because he loves! And why, why do people not see that?

"People, these days talk of things like how homosexuality is okay, and how abortion right. But Jesus, and God said it was wrong. It is wrong to kill, thus why abortion is wrong? But why do people still do it? Why do people still abort innocent children who can't defend themselves? Because they don't know God. They don't know that Jesus died to save them, they don't know. That is why, we must tell them. We must tell them about Jesus and how he died for our sins!"

The crowd started clapping and cheering. There were a few people around them who were growing uneasy. And Angel and Collins were one of the couples. Because they both knew what the next attack was against.

"And then homosexuals. The Bible, strictly says that homosexuality is wrong. A man should not be united in a holy union with another man. Marriage is a union between man and woman and it should stay that way. A woman and a woman should never marry each other. For it breaks the holiness and the reason why God established marriage. But, they should not even find someone of the same sex attracted to them. It is wrong, and wrong! But, if they knew Christ, they would not need to fall in love with another man or woman. If they knew Jesus, they would be happy, and would not need another man to keep them satisfied!"

Collins face was starting to flush and his pulse was rushing. His anger was growing at this person.

"If they had Jesus in their life, they would not have to complete the empty hole they feel, with homosexuality!"

People cheered.

Collins looked at his angel. She was extremely uncomfortable now, forgetting that the people she knew and stuff were once friends with her. He looked at Angel, and realized that someone had made his angel uncomfortable.

Someone had hurt his angel.

Before Collins could stop himself, he suddenly stood up and looked at the preacher. He didn't care what the people around him thought. He wanted this "preacher" to have a taste of his own medicine of what he did to his angel.

_Will I lose my dignity? _

"Do you even know what you are talking about?" Collins yelled up at the preacher. The preacher looked down at Collins, confused. "I mean, what about capital punishment, isn't that killing? So it's okay to kill a grown man, but it's not to kill a…a…fetus, that even isn't a person yet? Do you know science at all?"

The preacher remained silent. "Sir, please, sit down."

"And you know what? Who gives a damn if I'm gay. I don't care what you think, because I'm in love. I'm in love with the most beautiful man I've ever met, and I'm not afraid to say it. And why do we need to fill a hole? We don't a missing, gaping hole in our hearts like you people say we do! I mean, I grew up, never stepping inside a church, yet I'm happy and I don't have a hole. My life is complete, and I already know how I'm gonna die. So why do I need my "large hole" filled with empty lies that are against me?"

_Will someone care?_

"Sir, please, sit down or leave," the preacher said.

"And even if I did have this 'Jesus' person in my life, I wouldn't leave my Angel. I love her too deeply and too much for some guy I've never met."

"Sir, please sit down!"

Collins felt Angel tug at his arm. "Honey, let's go."

Angel stood up and took Collins' hand she looked at the preacher and smiled and then turned around promptly. Collins followed her but stopped in the middle of the aisle.

"I just wanna ask you a question sir. I want you to put yourself in my shoes. My name is Collins, I'm 26 years old, and I am gay. I have a partner that I love with all my heart and I have a teaching job at NYU. You may ask, what's so bad about that? Well sir, I have AIDS. My death has already been set. I want to ask you something."

_Will I wake tomorrow from this nightmare?_

Would you give up everything you love and own, and your partner that you love so much, for someone, who has decided to give you a slow and painful death? Would you give everything up, for a stranger that you've never met?"

The preacher and the whole room was silent, silent like the grave.

Collins smiled. "I thought so."

Collins took Angel around the waist and walked out of the church with her, not knowing that about twenty other people stood up and left with him.

Twenty other people, who had their feet in his shoes.

And one person, who put their feet in his shoes.


End file.
